RebeccaRuins

with every breath that i take in i swear on every inch of my lungs i'm with you; its okay to need each other, thats what makes us strong, thats what makes us human, and right now, the only thing that i'm really sure about is that; i love you. if i could tell you one thing, then id tell you everything. i would, for you. id probably say that youve been on my mind since we first held hands, talking to others to play off all the butterflies i had inside. that id never admit to. and now i think that you should know, that youve got everything that ive wanted for so damn long. i cant forget you, not ever, my darling' i know you want m

Seeing you while you sleep, you are at your most vulnerable state, your expression soft and peaceful; and I wonder what you are seeing behind those closed eyelids. I hope it's me. Your breathing is even and deep; almost a slight snore.  You have your entire body wrapped around my pillow, where I used to be laying, your face is buried in it .your bangs falling back to expose your beautiful face, and looking at you now makes my heart stop. I'm resisting so many impulses to lie down beside you, and kiss your forehead. It's hard not to, and coax myself into sleep with your warm body held close to my own. It's hard not to lie back down so I ca

Like every single person in this world, I have dealt with my struggles, my monsters under the bed, my inner demons, and the skeletons in my closet. Not many people are willing to admit that, though we live in a society of broken promises, torn commitments, and people hiding scars. 90 percent of the teenage population goes through depression spells, and they cut, self-mutilate, or attempt suicide. Thankfully, not many achieve it. I can honestly say, I have thought of, and attempted my own death. A fair amount of times, but that is not the point of this note. I'm going to let you know now, it does get better, I know what it's like to suffer thr

Here's to another night I'll spend alone; constantly occupying myself so I don't have to listen to my negative thoughts. Another night I'll coax myself into letting my guard down enough to sleep. Another night where I'll awake to the smell of cigarettes and the TV blaring to overwhelm the sound of you crying out his name; over and over. Another morning where I'll fight the urge to close my eyes again pull the pillow over my face and pray I never wake up. Just another morning of taking my pills, and fighting back the urge to swallow the whole bottle, because that one tiny white pill makes me feel so hopeless, weak, and insane. It will be j

 Brandon James Hobson; 14 years old, almost 15. On July 17th. Thats the age you'd be around right now. Mother and i have discussed the way you would look, we decided on something along the lines of jock, you'd probobly join football. you asshole. you'd be younger then me, but larger by far. considering my height of 5 foot 2. i know we'd playfight. i know you called me a dyke, and i'd call you much superior names, little brother. which i'd also rub in your face. LITTLE brother. ha. so many people don't know, of you, of your birth and passing. i do. i know the story. believe me when i say; your not missing much here on earth, it isin't that g

If I was displayed, my body cut open and evaluated, would I pass their tests? Would they know who I was, just by looking into me? Could they read my stories, my trials, would they know why each scar on my body is there? Would they understand the pressure of being a teenage girl, would they know of my sexuality? By evaluating my heart, tacked to a board for all to see, would they know I've been in love? Would they know the heartbreak I felt? Would they see the faces of my friends, who have the strongest impact on my life? By picking apart my brain, piece by fragile piece, would they hear the soft whispers of suicide, would they see my thoughts